LOVE - the feeling !!
Love is the most commonly talked over subject matter among youngsters ! However, falling into it is mostly unconscious - people feeling the True Love Hardly recognize it in the correct & nick of time. They expose it after a very long period. Moreover, The FeelIng that they are in love- tough to recognize or term as love, sometimes they feel they are in good relationship, good friends --- but actually may be in LOVE !!!
A very common question, "How can I tell I'm in
love?", but it is not an easy question to answer. What feels like love to
one person may be nothing more than attraction to another. Some people fall in
and out of love quickly and often while others are never really in love as much
as they are in lust. This can get confusing when you are a teen because
romantic love is a relatively new concept for you and you don't know what to
expect. You are overwhelmed with all sorts of new feelings and social
pressures. They are confusing. What is love? What makes you want a romantic
relationship with one person and not another? How does your heart choose a
partner? Why does love end? These questions can't be easily answered.
One of the most confusing quasi-love feelings is lust. Lust
is a very powerful, very intense feeling of physical attraction toward another
person. Lust is mainly sexual in nature - the attraction is superficial based
on instant chemistry rather than genuine caring. Usually we lust after people
we do not know well, people we still feel comfortable fantasizing about. It is
very common for people to confuse lust for love. But why? What is it about lust
and love that make them so easy to mix up? If lust is all about sex, how can a
relationship without sex be about lust? Teens struggle with this because they
see lust in the Biblical sense, but lust isn't that sinister. Lust is about
physical attraction and acting ONLY on physical attraction. Love is about much
more than that. Yet many teens (and to be fair, many adults) confuse an intense
attraction for some sort if divine love. For teens, since feelings of
attraction are still new and since pop-culture sells sex and love as one
package, it is very easy to get the two mixed up.
Lust is clearly not love. Love is based on more than just
physical attraction. Sure, attraction is a factor, but love goes deeper than
that. Love is based on caring, friendship, commitment and trust. When you are
in love it is as if you have your best most trusted friend at your side AND you
feel physically attracted to them. It is the best of both worlds! Love is a
shared feeling between two people who have a vested interest in one anothers
happiness. Love is not about jealousy. It is not about conflict. It is not about
testing. Love is a positive feeling. If it is tainted by mistrust, jealousy,
insecurity or spitefulness it is not really love but merely a pale copy. Love
is the total surrender of your heart to another person with the security of
knowing they will treat it better than you will. Love should feel good. It
should not feel bad. Love should make you want to be a better person, it should
not lead you to do something self destructive. Love is not demanding of your
spirit but lifts it and makes it glow. Love is a good thing. Anything less is
lust, deep friendship or attraction. So the sappiness aside, the question
remains, how can you tell you are in love?
There is no easy way to find the truth behind your feelings
or the feelings of another person but there are some tell-tale signs that love
is blooming (or growing deeper). If you agree with 7 of the following 9
statements you are probably in love.
You know, because
you have been told by your significant other, that your deep feelings are
returned in kind.
The object of your
affections makes you feel special and good about yourself.
If/when you feel
jealous it is always fleeting; you trust your partner not to betray you or hurt
your relationship.
Nothing makes you
feel as serene as when you and your partner are together.
When you fight
with your partner you usually make up within a few hours and you always agree
that nothing is more important than you both being able to express your true
feelings (even if they sometimes cause conflict).
Your partner never
asks you to choose between him/her and your loyalties to your family and
friends - if you do choose him/her over them you always have a good reason and
it is always YOUR decision, and your decision alone.
Neither you or
your partner feel the need to test the other's loyalties or feelings.
You are more
yourself when with your partner than you are with anybody else.
So, its we who are responsible & we need to give more time to ourselves. !! Face the situation with courage, have trust & be patient.
Posts
